I asked my mother what my grandma wanted for her funeral (my grandma was very unwell at the time and has Parkinson’s, so I thought it a pertinent question). My mother got so angry at me. I then asked my sister if she knew. She started crying and said she didn’t want to think about it I never thought that they would react that way. What surprises me about death is that the people you thought you knew really well react completely differently.