My dad died of cancer just before I was 17. I was an only child and very close to my dad. My mum was devastated but I couldn’t connect or communicate with her, I just shut off my emotions and disconnected from the situation. Mum desperately wanted, and needed, that emotional closeness and to talk about my Dad; she just didn’t really have anyone else to share her feelings with and friends stayed away, but I just didn’t know how to, or want to connect with her. I had a lovely boyfriend who is now my dear husband, and I shared my grief with him. My mum died four years ago and I was never able to connect with her emotionally and talk about ‘Daddy’. I wish I had been able to. I wish we had had access to support to help both of us, but we were just left on our own and we didn’t know what to do. I hope things will be better for our children and I hope that my mum knew in her heart that I cared.